you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
