its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
