Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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