Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
