i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
