can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Let's get the cat blown out
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize