she was so not down for the gang bang
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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