i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
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