margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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