so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
