Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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