Just fell off a train. Bad.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Redeem this text for a blowjob
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Randomize
