Dual....:-)
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
organizing the empties. That sober.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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