This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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