it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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