I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
