I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
did i walk over a car last night?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
