Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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