When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
