My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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