found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
