Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
he shaved USA in his pubs
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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