You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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