What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Randomize