For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
We had to coat check the pizza.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
