My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I have fence marks all over my body
Randomize
