I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Randomize
