return my video game
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
