I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
