He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Randomize
