guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
