Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
