She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
