I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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