Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
