what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize