i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
