All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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