the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
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