actually, I'm a sock model
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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