I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
