You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
