laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Did we literally take a cab across the street
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
