Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
