I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
