i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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