I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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