It's Friday. Sex?
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
