Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
