I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Randomize
